It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing
by darkangel9314
Summary: Elena Gilbert has always been abused whether it be at the school no one likes her in or at the safety of her own home, but when Elena issues a plan to commit suicide can her new friend Damon Salvatore save her from herself or will the pain consume her completely?
1. Chapter 1

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 1

Elena sighed as she waited for the bus to pick her up. She had to get out of here and start her life over again. She needed a way out of her shitty home life and horrible school system. She needed to live again. She wanted to live again.

Elena exhaled as the bus pulled to a stop and she was so close to going up those steps when her 'mother' pulled her back.

"I'm sorry sir. My daughter's not going anywhere."

The bus driver nodded and closed the door leaving Elena alone and deprived at her last chance at freedom.

"Are you crazy?" he mother said grabbing her ear and pulling her back into her junkyard of a car. It always reeked but Elena expected no different. It was the same way her clothes always smeeled because they had no real money to spare. With her mom's drug addiction and her father's booze and gambling addiction she was surprised that they still had this piece of shit car.

"You're in big trouble when we get home Elena. I guess you're the one who's not getting super when you get home."

"You never have any money for it anyway."

"What did you say you little whore?"

"Don't act like you didn't hear me."

"You are such a little ungrateful whore you know that. I pull you out of that horrible foster care system your birth mother put you in because she didn't want your ass. I give you food, home, and family to call your own and this is the thanks I guess. I mean I also get you laid every other week. Isn't that good enough for you?"

"Those men force themselves on me since you pimp me out. I never wanted this life. You just wanted all of us for the money."

"I will admit I get a nice chunk of cash to put up with your ass."

Elena rolled her eyes as her mother pulled the car over and punched her multiple times. Elena swore she had a cut above her upper life and a swollen black eye by then end of it.

"Don't you ever disrespect your mother again. You fucking ungrateful bitch or the next one you get will be worse."

Elena exhaled as her mother pulled her from the car and pulled her inside. A man was waiting for her on the couch and she pushed Elena towards him.

"Change of plans Graig. She's all yours. By the way Elena he loves ass stuff so have fun."

Elena cried as the man pulled her into the bedroom. She closed her eyes during the horrible ordeal trying to picture anything besides what was happening. When Graig was done Elena pushed him off of her and ran to the bathroom to scrub the scent of him off.

It was truly disgusting every time her mother put her through that as a punishment. She couldn't stand to be here any longer, but there was no way out. There was no place she could hide where her parents couldn't find her. She was all alone in this world and she knew from this point on it will only get worse.


	2. Chapter 2

It Only Hurt When I'm Breathing

Chapter 2

Elena woke up the next day dreading her life and all that was in it. She wanted it all to end and very soon. She didn't have a reason to live so she wasn't going to live in her life pretending that it would ever get better. Elena got out of her bed that creaked a lot when she got out of it. She hoped it hadn't woken up her mom. The last thing she needed was another brutal beating and pleasuring yet another man so she could make her mom money as punishment. She just couldn't handle that anymore.

Elena took out a piece of paper she found in the trashcan and wrote down the note that she had been waiting to write ever since they put her in this broken down foster home. She exhaled and jotted down her suicide note explaining why she had to do what she was going to do.

A knock on the door startled her out of her thoughts as she shoved the note into her pocket.

"You better be ready for school Elena if you're late again I have a four o clock appointment whose into younger girls and I have no problem selling your body as punishment. Now get a move on."

Elena broke her pencil and shoved it into her pocket so that if her mother wasn't true to her word she could stab the guy in the neck later. That would lose her mom a quick buck. Elena exhaled and got ready to go through yet another day of torture at school.

The day had started out exactly as Elena had expected. The populars had tortured her but this time they were being extremely torturous .

"Hey slut." Rebekah Mikaelson had said grabbing her by the collar.

"Wow Elena. Don't you wear anything besides this shirt you're so disgusting and we should treat you as if you are disgusting. Right Rebekah?" Katherine said with a devious smile.

Rebekah smiled with her as they took me into the bathroom stalls and shoved my head into the toilet drowning my face in the nasty toilet water that was there and giving it a few flushes while making me admit that I was disgusting and wasn't worthy of anything. They picked her head back up by her hair and threw her on the floor laughing while they kicked her in the sides and on the face.

Elena pulled her hand back to see blood on her lips.

"God Elena. It's sad that you never fight back." Rebekah said giving her one last kick to the face as the others laughed and exited the bathroom.

Elena pulled herself back up and cleaned herself up a little bit while the rest of the period was dedicated to calling her the sewer slut who liked it down and dirty. A few guys had even said they would still tap it if they could put a bag over her head and fuck her into oblivion because she obviously needed it. Elena had hid her head ad Rebekah had said that Elena probably wouldn't mind because she pleasured some of her whore moms clients without a single resistents so she must have been the biggest slut ever. One boy even went as far to give her his number so he could receive a killer blow job sometime. They all laughed and left the classroom as Elena gathered her stuff and ran straight into a guy that she had never seen before.

She thought he would be angry with her, but instead he helped her up and smiled at her handing her a spare shirt from his backpack.

"I'm sorry about that. Here you can use my extra shirt for the rest of the day. It might stink a little but it's better than being wet and reeking of toilet water."

"Thanks. I guess you're going to bully me or ask for my number too right?"

"No offense, but I don't know you or anyone well enough to do that. Plus I would never bully anyone and I'm new here so I get how brutal these people can be. Also I'm Damon Salvatore and you are?"

"Elena Gilbert."

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you Elena Gilbert."

"Even when I smell like toilet water?

"Even then."

Elena smiled as Damon picked up the suicide note that fell out of her pocket and started reading it with a face full of concern.

"Elena I-"

She snatched the note out of his hand and shoved it into her pocket. She so didn't need this right now.

"I have to go. It was nice meeting you Damon really."

She gave him a half smile and ran away. That was so embarrassing. Now she would be a suicidal freak on top of everything else and she couldn't bare that any longer. She needed to find an exit strategy out of this life and she had to do it quick before it got any worse.


	3. Chapter 3

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 3

Elena sighed as she continued to beat herself up over the fact that Damon had seen her suicide note. How could she be so stupid and take it to school with it? She sighed again and stabbed her fork to what they called food in school. That's when Damon sat down next to her with a concerned look on his face. She wished that he would stop gawking at her.

"What do I owe this lovely little visit?"

"Are we seriously going to ignore the fact that I saw your suicide note?"

"Keep your voice down. I'm already a huge freak here. I don't need to give them another reason to torment me."

"I'm sorry. I just want to know what's making your life so bad that you have to turn to this method to end it."

"You don't know me so stop treating me like you do."

Elena sat up but Damon caught her arm and sat her back down.

"What do you want?"

"I want to show you that life can be more than what you think it is. It does get better just wait and see."

"Okay say if I went along with your little plan. What's in it for me?"

"How about I make you a little deal. You give me two months to prove that your life can improve and if I'm right you won't go through with this crazy suicide mission."

"And what happens if you don't?"

"Then I will help you carry out this crazy suicide idea of yours."

"You seriously mean that?"

"I do."

"Fine. It's a deal then, because I know that it won't get any better than this."

Damon laughed and Elena looked at him as if he was crazy.

"What's so funny?"

"It's funny, because I know it will work."

Elena smiled at him. He sure was cocky for a guy who barely just met her.

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see then."

"I guess we will."


	4. Chapter 4

It Only Hurt When I'm Breathing

Chapter 4

Elena wrote in her notebook wanting to avoid the hardships of life when suddenly her notebook was shut and dragged away from her. She really hated when that happened, but she had been bullied so much that she had grown accustomed to it. She looked up to see who the culprit was and was shocked to see Damon holding her notebook to his chest. Well she guessed that she couldn't keep fooling herself into believing that Damon actually gave a shit about her, but at least now attempting suicide would be easier on her.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Well I was writing in my notebook, but now I guess I'm listening to you."

"Good, because I was wondering if you wanted to hang out."

"With you?"

"Do you see anyone else around here?"

She rolled her eyes and got up to go over to him.

"Fine I guess."

Damon and her started walking when the conversation turned deep.

"So Gilbert. Why is a girl like you wanting to commit suicide?"

"If you knew about my life you would understand why I want to end it."

"Enlighten me then. Make me understand why you should end it."

"Because my mom sucks ass."

He laughed. Elena had to admit it was a nice laugh.

"What makes your mother so bad?"

"Well unlike most mothers their daughters claim are bitches my mother actually is one. "

"again I ask what does she do?"

"She is actually a prostitute who beats me senseless and pimps me out to her john who rape me if I'm not willing."

"That's horrible."

"Yeah."

"Have you ever had a real relationship before?"

"No actually, but with a mother like mine who needs a relationship."

Damon stopped and tries to hug her, but she pulled away. She didn't need that right now.

"Okay if we're going to be friends you can't do that."

"Do what?"

"Hug me when you think it's appropriate."

"Noted. No hugging. Got it."

Elena looked down at her watch and sighed. It was time for her to go home.

"I have to go home. Thanks for whatever this was."

"I enjoyed hanging out with you Elena."

She smiled. "You'd be the first."

She walked away and went back home to her less than perfect world.


	5. Chapter 5

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 5

Elena took a deep breath as she clutched her stomach that was now fresh with bruises that had been inflicted by her mother and one of her johns. The only thing that kept Elena from completely breaking down was the simpler times that she had had with her own mother.

Believe it or not there were times that Elena's mother had been sane. Those were simpler times when her mother had not been on drugs and alcohol. She exhaled and searched her memories for one that would put her mind at ease.

It was one from when she was merely five years old, but something was better than nothing.

It was a perfect summer day and Elena's mother had taken her to the park. They had flied kites together and laughed as Elena got hers stuck in a tree. It had been the perfect day, but unfortunately the perfect day didn't last forever. Now her mother was just a shell of herself. A heartless woman who showed no love or remorse for her broken child.

Even if Damon did find a way to show Elena that life was beautiful she still knew one thing for certain. She had to get away from her toxic mother. One way or the other.


	6. Chapter 6

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 6

Warning: this chapter has topic that are uncomfortable and may trigger others.

Elena looked at herself in the mirror that had just been newly broken as she pressed a wet cloth to her bleeding arm. It wasn't the only thing that stung but she had to take care of one problem at a time first.

She always hated her mother's punishments this one had been especially cruel and it had all started, because of one stupid date.

Earlier that day

Elena stretched as she got off her bed that creaked slightly. Today was a Saturday and she didn't have any real plans. That's when she heard a surprising knock on the door. It was probably one of her mother's johns but it seemed to be too early for their usual house call, so Elena would have to deal with her mother's house guest.

She walked to the door and opened it surprised to see Damon standing on the other side of it. Elena looked around to see if her mother or one of her johns was around then looked back to Damon.

"Damon you shouldn't be here. It's too dangerous."

"Listen Elena, I know you're scared, but just hear me out."

"You have five seconds before I shut this door."

"Alright this might sound crazy, but I'm here to ask you on a date."

"Excuse me."

"I want to ask you on a date."

"Oh I get it this is just a part of our deal. Let me tell you this Damon, I'm not giving up my plans of suicide just because you asked me on a date."

She tried to slam the door in his face but he stopped it with his hand.

"Elena please hear me out."

Elena rolled her eyes and opened the door a little wider.

"Like I said you have five seconds. I would start talking now if I was you."

"Listen I don't want to take you out on a pity date Elena. Believe it or not through this crazy experience I actually really started to like you. And as much as I would like to take you on a date , I would understand if it's not what you're into, but I would like for the chance to prove you wrong."

Elena scoffed and looked around at her ratty old clothes.

"Well I really don't have any date clothes, besides I'm not Cinderella there's no fairy Godmother to save me from y shitty ass situation or from my shitty ass clothes either."

"I don't care what you wear Elena. You're beautiful just the way you are."

Elena fought back the smile forming on her lips and heard the door creaking open signaling her mother's arrival.

"Alright fine one date, but you must leave now. If my mother catches you here it will spell out disaster for me. Meet my tonight at 6 in the park."

Damon nodded as Elena shut the door tightly just as her mother walked in looking like hell like she usually did.

"Who the fuck was that?"

"It was just some annoying salesperson. Don't worry I got rid of him."

Elena's mother nodded as she went back to her room. Elena shut her door quickly and got out her decent clothes that she had gotten from a bargain clothes store when her mother was having one of her good days.

Elena looked through every decision until she finally found the one she liked. It was simple enough so her mother wouldn't question it if she went out. Elena looked at herself in the mirror after she was done getting dressed and admitted that she did look good.

The outfit Elena had chosen had consisted of a sheer light pink button up top with white pants, pink and turquoise heels, and similar earing. She had also added a touch of makeup and a red hair streak her mother had given her on a whim. The outfit was absolutely perfect.

Now all she had to do was sneak out of the house before her mother knew what she was up to. It wasn't that difficult for her to sneak out. She had done it many times in the past nights that she had been somewhat of a slave to her mother, but now was her day to be Cinderella and she be damned if she would let anyone take that away from her.

When Elena got to the park she was actually shocked to see Damon looking at her as if she was an actual girl he would actually be interested in. She was the first to admit that she wasn't as pretty as Rebekah, but she had never really tried to wear her nicer clothes to school in fear that she would actually make a friend or two.

Elena took a step towards her as he instinctively did the same thing. They continued to do this until they were right by each other.

"You look beautiful." He said breaking the spell he had suddenly had on her.

"I have to go over a few ground rules of this date." She blurted out.

"Then by all means go ahead." He smiled which made the corners of his eyes crinkle.

"There will be no kissing or holding hands or other physical contact. We will go on talking like we've always done. Do we understand each other?"

"Why are you so reluctant to let people in?"

"With a mother like mine things like those are taught to you at such a young age."

Damon nodded as he looked up to the stars.

"It really is a beautiful night. What would you like to do?"

"I'm not really one for going out in public. I think star gazing will do just fine. That and talking because talking is always a good thing." She babbled on like an idiot.

"You're nervous."

She tried to hide her shock. How could he have possibly known that?

"If it helps your nerves any, you look great. I mean you literally took my breath away back there."

Elena smiled at the cheesiness of it all as they sat down in the grass. She knew that the grass would stain her pants, but at that moment she didn't care.

"So tell me more about your doom and gloom story." He said out of the blue.

She looked at him with a blank look.

"You know we always talk about my family, what's the deal on yours?"

"Well my mom died and my father's an asshole. I also have a brother who doesn't acknowledge my existence so basicially it's really nothing."

"I'm sorry."

"Why would you be sorry? My family is way less dysfunctional then…."

"Then mine. You can say it. I won't get offended."

He smiled breaking a little bit of the tension between them.

"So tell me more. I know it helps you when you talk about it."

"Alright I'm going to go a little morbid here and tell you what my mom does for a living. My family is so dysfunctional that my mother is a prostitute. She brings her john home every night and sometimes when they're done with her they go after me. Was that enough detail for you sunshine or do you need a whole fucking biography on my life."

Damon grabbed Elena's hand and she flinched away. She didn't like being touched as the memoires came crawling back to her.

"You don';t have to tell me about it. We'll talk about something else."

"No. In order for you to know why I'm thinking about committing suicide in the first place I think you should hear about exactly why I'm doing it."

Damon looked at her with concern in his face.

"The first memory I had of being raped was absolutely awful. …"

(Warning: the following contain subject matter that may trigger. I will put a parenthesis on the end of this segment so that you can skip over it if you want to)

Four years ago

Elena unlocked the door to the house as she heard a loud crash coming from the kitchen. Not this again. She thought as she slowly made her way to the kitchen to see what was going on. Her mother was on the floor crying while one of her johns hovered over her. His pants were down and his erection had long since been set free.

This wasn't an unusual thing for Elena to come home to. After all it was her mother's profession to please men any way they wanted her to. Elena knew it was wrong and her mother really needed to get out of this, but no matter how many times Elena tried to help her mother she would always just come back to this.

But this time for Elena it was different. She could tell this guy was actually hurting her mom. She wouldn't let that happen to her mom again. Without giving it much thought Elena grabbed the frying pan her mother had left on the stove and struck the man's head with it.

He stumbled onto the floor as her mother looked at her with bewildered eyes. They couldn't afford much time to think about it. She grabbed her mother off the floor and started to run to their room, but Elena wasn't fast enough and the man had grabbed her by her hair.

"Mom! Run!" was all she managed to say before she was tossed across the floor and hit her head on the counter. Elena groaned as she clutched the back of her head.

The man grabbed her by the color of her shirt and ripped it off.

"You stupid bitch. I paid your mother for sex and if I can't get it from her I'll just take you instead."

Elena tried to struggle away from the man, but it was useless when he put his full body weight on her. She cried out for her mother even though she knew her mother wouldn't hear her.

"Relax baby. This will only hurt a little bit.

She cried as he ripped the button of her jeans off and flipped her over.

"I hope you don't mind, but I love doing some ass stuff first with no lube of course. You were such a stupid little slut that I'm going to make you pay for what you did."

Elena had no clue what he was doing until she felt him enter her ass first. She screamed as he continuously rammed into it over and over until he had filled her. She cried but didn't have much time for what was next.

He flipped her over as she saw her own feces on him. She wanted to hurl at that moment but what he did next was beyond horrible.

"You want to taste yourself little girl."

Elena struggled to keep her mouth closed but all he did was pry it open and shoved himself in her mouth. She wanted to gag but every time she did he would shut her mouth so she would just swallow it again.

"Please stop." She cried after he has felt like she had gotten all of it off.

His hands came to her throat as he cut off her airs circulation. At that moment she had almost wished that God had taken her right then and there.

"Not a chance sweet heart." He said and then shoved himself into her.

She cried out at the pain since she had never done any of this before. She didn';t understand why God was letting this monster do all these things to her. When he was finally done and had finished inside her spilling all of his liquid into her. He had jumped up and kicked Elena in the face and ribs so that her breath was taken from her.

"Tell your mom you were a good fuck and I'll see her next Tuesday."

The man left as Elena stayed on the floor crying over her bruised and broken body.

(End of scene)

Elena wipped away the tears from her face as she tried to regain her composure. The past couple of times men had raped her because of her mother it hadn't been nearly as bad. Well except for the stabbing incident, but she didn't want to let Damon in on that one.

Elena looked at Damon as he stroked the hair from her cheek.

"Now do you understand my pain?"

"I couldn't possibly tell you that I know what you are going through, because I don't. "

"Thank you for your honesty." She said trying to get up but he held her there.

"What happened to you was horrible. Beyond horrible Elena. You shouldn't have to live like that."

"Why do you think I want to die then?"

He held her hand and Elena had to admit that it felt good.

"I'll help you."

"What?"

"I'll help you do it. I might be against the idea and I really wish that you would give living a chance, but if you really want to end it. I'll help you end it so you won' be alone."

"I'm not going to do it yet Damon. We had a deal and I won't go back on it, but thank you for finally understanding."

Then Elena didn't know what suddenly came over her, but she leaned into Damon and their lips met. He seemed a little taken aback by it, but didn't complain. She felt her back on the cold grass as Damon leaned over her never once breaking their kiss.

Elena had always thought that this is what kisses should feel like and it was everything she had imagined and more. Damon's hands roamed her body, but never once left her sides. They continued kissing until she heard her name being called and was petrified when she saw her mother standing there.

It looked as if her midnight moment had finally came. Her mother pulled her up by the arm, but Damon tried to hang onto her hand.

"Come on Elena let's go."

"She's not going anywhere with you." Damon said narrowing his eyes at her mother.

"I'm her mother it's in my legal right to do so. Now fuck off. If you want to screw my daughter you're going to have to pay like the rest of them."

"Your daughter's body is not an ATM! She's not your property. She's a person. What the fuck is wrong with you that you don't see that?"

Her mother let go of her arm and punched Damon in the face.

"Mom! Stop it! Don't hurt him! I'll go with yo just please don't hurt him!"

Her mother turned her eyes to hers and grabbed onto a fistful of her hair dragging her daughter along by it.

"Oh you bet you're coming with me missy and believe me your punishment will be horrible this time. I'm pretty sure Burt needs a good dick sucking again don't you agree."

Elena cried as she turned her head painfully towards Damon giving him one last glance before her mother shoved her into the car and to her nightmare.


	7. Chapter 7

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 7

Elena would never forget this night for as long as she lived, because it was the night that she finally fought back. Her mother was dragging her back home when she finally thought this. She hated her mother. Elena finally felt as if she was normal and here was her mother trying to force her back into her old one. Not today.

She struggled to get out of her mother's grasp as she clawed at her arm and did everything she could to get her to let go. Her mother opened the door and threw her to the ground. Elena grunted, but she refused to let her mother get the best of her.

As soon as her mother got near her, Elena kicked up and made a swift kick to her mother's croutch. She grabbed at it howling in pain as Elena got up and ran to the bathroom locking the door in the process. She looked at herself in the mirror as the rambling at the door stopped. Elena went over to the door and unlocked it.

It proved to be a bad decision when her mother threw her into the mirror head first. Elena cried out as her mother turned her around putting her hands around her neck and squeezing. She coughed as her mother brought one of her hands across her face in a punch.

"You ungrateful bitch. I'll make you pay."

Elena gasped for air as her hands searched around. Her hand finally clenched across what she needed as she plunged the piece of mirror into her mothers neck. Her mother fell to the floor screaming and trying to get the piece of mirror out.

Elena ran to the door, but was tossed to the floor. Her mother stood there with the piece of mirror still in her neck. Elena tried to get away but her mother pulled her to her by her foot and climbed on top of her chocking her again.

Elena tried to fight back, but her mother was too strong,

"Whose laughing now you stupid little bitch that I should have swallowed. I didn't want you in the first place, but now i'm going to correct that mistake. Bye Bye little girl."

That's when a true miracle happened. One minute Elena's mother was on top of her and the next she was on the ground. Damon stood there with a frying pan in his hand. He had swung it with such froce that her mother had been knocked out. Thank God.

Elena pulled air into her lungs as Damon slid his hands underneath her body carrying her out of the house and into his car.

"Don't worry Elena. I'm going to get you to a hospital and after you get out I'm taking you back to my house. You'll never have to see that monster again."

Elena grabbed her throat. She had a feeling this was far from over.


	8. Chapter 8

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 8

Elena sucked in a breath as Damon put peroxide on her cuts. It hurt like a bitch, but at least she was safe and sound away from her psychotic bitch of a mother. She gently touched her neck wincing. It was still pretty sensitive. Damon touched her cheek and she winced again. Not from pain, but she couldn't stand someone touching her at the moment.

Damon seemed to notice and pulled back a little bit more.

"Sorry."

"It's okay."

Damon gave her a little smile and went back to cleaning her cuts. She was glad that he saved her tonight.

"Thank you again for saving me. I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't been there."

"I'll always save you Elena."

She gave him a little smile. Her face still hurt a little bit. Not as much as her neck, but still.

"There you go. You're all done."

Elena smiled even though she was sure that she would never be okay again. She would have to go back home sometime and she dreaded that day. She was for sure dead the next time her mother saw her. She had to do something before then. She just didn't know what.

Damon touched Elena's neck and she winced.

"It's still really swollen. Are you sure you don't want to go to the hospital?"

"No. No hospitals. She can find me there They'll make me go back home with her. Even if I did tell them the truth."

Damon sighed. "it'll be bruised for a while."

"Great. Another reason for Rebakah to make my life a living hell. She'll have a field day with this."

"Just let me deal with Rebekah. She's all bark and no bite. Are you hungry? I can make soup so you don't have to use you throat as much."

"I'm fine. Thank you though. I'm just really tired."

Damon smiled and offered her his hand. She reluctantly took it and he led her to his bed. He pulled back the covers and she slipped into them. He tucked her in and gave her a light kiss on the forehead.

"I'll be in the living room if you need me." he said moving towards the door.

"Damon"

He turned around with his hand on the knob.

"Will you stay with me? I'm afraid of being alone."

Damon back away from the door and nodded moving back towards the bed and crawling into the other side of the bed. She felt herself getting tired as she snuggled closer to him. She had to admit that this was nice even if she did hate other people touching her.

"Thank you again for saving me. If you hadn't been there I would have been dead. I already know that."

Damon cuddled closer to her as if he was afraid of losing her just as she was afraid of losing him. When had all of this happened? She had no clue, but she think she liked it.

"I'll always save you Elena."

She smiled as a tear fell on her face. It was nice to finally have someone who cared about her. So this was how normal people felt like. It must have been very nice to grow up in such a loving and caring home. She wished her home was like this instead of how it actually was. But she didn't want to think about that right now. She just wanted to do one thing and one thing only. She wanted to kiss Damon Salvatore.

She sat up and looked at Damon. His face looked at her with confusion.

"What?" he said searching her eyes.

She took a big breath and kissed his lips. They felt soft and warm. She smiled against them as he kissed her back. So this was what it was like to be kissed for real. When you actually wanted to kiss the person that was kissing you.

Elena felt her back hit against his bed as his hands roamed underneath her shirt. He looked at her and she broke the kiss wincing she still didn't want to be touched. It was way too soon. She sat up taking deep, calming breaths as she settled back into herself.

"I'm sorry if I went too fast." he said looking at her with concern.

She shook her head now feeling silly for overreacting.

"No. I'm sorry. I guess I'm still a little bit shaken up about all of this."

"It's not your fault that your mother is a complete psycho path."

Elena nodded. Even she couldn't defend her mother's actions at this point. After all she did try to choke her to death. She let out a huge sigh and fell back onto the pillow. All she wanted now was to sleep. Damon soon followed suite and cuddled her until she fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 9

The sun came in through the curtains as Elena opened her eyes. Damon's arms were around her as she took in her surroundings. This wasn't her house but this was the first time she could ever remember waking up in peace. But peace came at a price, she was sure her mother would give her an ass whopping so hard that she would never find peace again. After all her mother was good at destroying her life in various ways. At least she could enjoy this moment for a little bit longer before it all went to hell.

She turned slightly careful not to wake Damon as she looked at his face. His eyes were still closed and she had to admit he was pretty cute, but she couldn't keep watching him sleep. She sighed and cuddled into him further. She loved feeling his body next to hers. She loved feeling a peaceful moment in this chaotic world of hers. She was just glad that at least she had this if she were going to die soon.

Damon's eyelids fluttered open as his blue eyed gaze filled her own. She sucked in a breath finding it hard to breath all of a sudden. She had never had this feeling before usually the guys she woke up with either repulsed her or scared the living hell out of her, but for Damon he was neither one of those things. With him she didn't feel scared she felt safe and that's the way she should have always felt. Unfortunately life didn't work that way. Especially when it came to her own. She had to get out of here before this illusion fooled her further. She couldn't take this moment of perfection when her life was so chaotic.

She sprang off the bed moving towards her clothes and threw them back on. They had about forty minutes before school and she didn't want to make her mom more upset. Maybe she would go easier on her that way.

Damon looked at her squinting slightly. "What are you doing?"

"Getting ready for school like a normal person."

"Well normal people usually don't go to school on Saturday."

Elena stopped looking at Damon. Shit. It couldn't be Saturday. Without school she had no safe haven from her mother. What the hell was she going to do now?

"You can stay here as long as you like you don't have to go back to her."

Elena nodded and sat back down on the bed. She had to admit that she didn't want to go back to her mother just yet. She had to give her a chance to calm down first. It was the least she could do for her mother at the moment.

Damon scooted closer to her and put his arms around her. They still hadn't talked about what happened last night and they really needed to. It was best not to avoid these kind of topics. She was running from too much already. She didn't want to add him to the list.

"We need to talk about what happened last night." she said looking at him.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"What exactly are we now?"

"What did you want us to be Elena?"

"I asked you first."

Damon sighed as he looked to his window. She followed his gaze and looked out into the peaceful day for most subterranean people. She wondered if her life would have been any different if she had grown up in this environment instead of the one she was currently in. Would her mom treat her differently or would her demons still consume her on harsh nights? She had no real clue so she decided not to dwell on it too much. It was just during these times that she found it hard to cope with her current situation.

Elena sighed looking away from her shattered dreams of a normal life ad turned Damon's face back towards her. She had to admit she had no clue what they were, but she was hoping that he would stay with her until her life ended. Whether it was from her own accord or somebody else s.

She looked at Damon willing him to answer her question. All she really needed was one simple answer.

"To tell you the truth Elena, I don't know exactly what we are. All I really know for sure is that I want to keep you safe. I don't want a repeat of what happened last night. I can't imagine losing you to her or losing you at all even. It's the reason I'm trying to keep you alive so much even though all you really want right now is to take your own."

Elena bit on her lip trying not to interrupt. She didn't know how she felt about this whole suicide thing anymore all she really knew was that now she was conflicted. Sure her home life was still terrible, but now she had another person to take into factor. A person who would actually genuinely miss her if she was gone. decisions were always simple for her, but they were becoming more complicated now.

She sighed and leaned into Damon. She wasn't sure what they were either but she knew that she was willing to find out. No matter what the cost was. She just hoped that at some point Damon would feel the same.


	10. Chapter 10

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 10

Elena was almost fully healed from the injuries her mother had given to her when Damon had given her the worst news she had heard for weeks.

"What do you mean I have to go back to school? She asked giving him a look of disbelief.

He sighed and sat down in the bed next to her. She had been sharing it with him for a couple of weeks and those had been the happiest moments of her life, but she refused to go back to a place that she didn't feel safe.

Damon grabbed Elena's hand in a comforting gesture and squeezed it.

"Elena, we've worked on this. You need to face your fears and one of those fears are the things that are beyond your control. You need an education and this is the only way we can get you one. Don't let your feat get the best of you."

Elena knew he was right. She just didn't know how to go about this. She guessed she would have to find out. She nodded at Damon throwing off her covers and getting dressed. Today would finally be the day she stood up for herself. She as tired of being weak. She needed this.

When they finally got to school, Damon placed his hand in hers and together they walked into the school. Eyes locked on hers as she walked the halls. She was almost to class when she was shoved into a locker. She looked into the eyes of Rebekah as she smiled.

"Well hello poppet. Where have you been?"

Let me go Rebekah." she said

"Oh come on we were just having some fun." she said drawing her fist back.

But before she could land a blow on Elena, Elena threw her fist forward and punched Rebekah in the nose. She stumbled back and Elena went back to Damon amazed at what she just did. Rebekah looked at her with her nose bleeding and smiled.

She charged to Elena and Damon shoved her to the ground in order to protect her.

"Your boyfriend can't protect you forever Elena. Your ass is mine."

"Come on." Damon said taking Elena from the scene.

What had she done?


	11. Chapter 11

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 11

When it came to Saturdays, Elena usually dreaded their arrival, but ever since she had became Damon's girlfriend she felt as if Saturdays weren't that bad. But she didn't expect this Saturday to be one of the best ones she's ever had.

It had all started when she woke up that morning. Damon was staring into her eyes and she stared right back giving her a small smile.

"Good morning." she said yawning.

"Good morning beautiful. How do you feel about going out today?"

"Where to?"

"My parents had some last minute plans they had to bail out on but they didn't want the tickets to go to waste so did you want to go with me?"

"To where?"

"You'll just have to wait and see."

Elena smiled at him as she got out of bed and got dressed. She didn't know exactly what they were doing but she was excited to find out.

When they finally got there, Elena's mouth hung open in amazement as she looked at the helicopter. What were they doing that required the use of a helicopter?

"What's going on?" she asked

"We're living."

She smiled as she took his hand and they went to the helicopter stepping inside.

Elena stared in amazement as they looked at the sights. Normally it would scare other people, but Elena loved the thrill of it.

"So when do we land?" she said not wanting this to end.

"We don't"

She looked at him sharply. What the hell was he talking about?

He lifted out two parachutes and touched one of the pilots on the shoulder.

"Elena this is our skydiving instructor."

She blinked. Skydiving Instructor?

"What?"

"This is what my parents canceled on."

"Oh."

"You're not scared are you? I thought Elena Gilbert was fearless."

Elena smiled and grabbed her parachute.

"Fine. Let's do this."

After some instruction about what exactly to do. Elena looked at Damon smiling as he squeezed her hand than let go. Here goes nothing.

She divided out of the helicopter and yelled out in excitement as the ground came nearer in her vision. She pulled the parachute and landed feeling the rush as soon as she came down. Damon followed soon after and gave her a hug.

"That was amazing." she laughed giving him a hug.

"I'm glad you liked it."

"Thank you so much." she said giving him a kiss feeling like she could be in that moment forever.


End file.
